A touchy-feely person often makes other people uncomfortable.
Are you a touchy-feely person?
Touching a loved one is a sign of affection. It’s a natural thing to do. But that doesn’t mean you can show affection by touching just about anyone. There is a right time and place for physical contact.
However, the truth is that some super humans, also known as God’s greatest gifts to humanity, are inclined to express their feelings of love and affection for others by touching them—sometimes out of habit, but often in an appropriate way. When it comes to touching others in an unwelcome manner, they are decorum-agnostic.
They forget, or deliberately choose to ignore, a simple fact that you can be a touchy-feely person—or whatever you want to be—in your intimate relationships. But that kind of behaviour is unsuitable when you are among not-so-close friends or colleagues.
Some people are often oblivious of the extent to which they make other people uncomfortable.
That’s because many people don’t like it when a person of little familiarity or intimacy touches them, establishes any physical contact with them, or stands too close for comfort.
Take the example of this woman who once asked in a newspaper Q&A column:
Dear Diana, I recently joined a new workplace and a male colleague has this habit of touching everyone to prove his point.
I hate this touchy-feely person at work. Though I’m aware that he does it to everyone as it’s his habit, I feel it’s inappropriate and a bit too much to handle at times.
Clearly, she was not okay with the colleague’s behaviour, and she wanted him to stop. That’s the kind of touchy-feely behaviour which is wrong simply because it makes the other person uncomfortable.
Meet a famous touchy-feely person
Former US vice president Joe Biden, 77, has always been described as a “touchy-feely person.” He is known to get physical, with pretty much everyone.
Although he is also known as one of the more empathetic politicians, some women came out in the open and said his tendency to touch others was just not right.
According to an article on vice.com, former Nevada State Assemblywoman Lucy Flores accused Biden of awkwardly smelling her hair and kissing the back of her head as he was standing behind her at an event in 2014.
The photo below is from another event in 2015 where Biden again stood way too close to another woman.
Biden stood dangerously close to Stephanie Carter, wife of ex-defence secretary Ash Carter (right), at an event in 2015. Stephanie later defended Biden during the #MeToo controversy, saying he had his hands on her shoulders ‘as a means of offering his support’.
Another article in usatoday.com said that the image above, and several others captured over the years, have been used by Biden’s detractors to depict him as “creepy Uncle Joe”.
The key point is that you can be physically expressive with people in your intimate life, but the tendency to get overfamiliar with everyone cannot be considered acceptable behaviour. It is bound to put off people beyond a point.
Dr Vanessa Bohns, a social psychologist from Columbia University, says:
People are often oblivious of the extent to which they make other people uncomfortable. People who are trying to be affectionate or romantic often fail to adequately take the other person’s perspective into account and therefore underestimate how uncomfortable the other person feels.
Dr Bohns could not be more apparent. It is important to understand how comfortable a person is with your behaviour. There are certain personal boundaries that need to be respected. Even by a touchy-feely person.
Touchy-feely person’s handwriting
In handwriting analysis, a person’s tendency for social distance is revealed by the way he organises the space between words. In a way, the word spacing also reflects how much distance a person wants or needs to maintain in order to feel comfortable around other people.
For example, very wide spaces between words indicate the writer’s need to maintain his distance from social contact. He is not comfortable being too close to someone—physically or emotionally.
On the other hand, the spacing between words is very narrow in the handwriting of a compulsive touchy-feely person. Very narrow spaces between the words show the writer is craving constant contact and seeking physical closeness.
Read more about spacing between words, and what it reveals about the personality of a person.
Joe Biden’s handwriting analysis
Since we have taken Joe Biden as an example of a touchy-feely person, I will now show you his handwriting where the word spacing in general is narrow.
The overall spacing between words is narrow in Joe Biden’s handwriting, especially the highlighted portions, which shows his tendency to be a touchy-feely person.
The spacing between words is considered narrow if it is insufficient to accommodate a lowercase ‘m’ from that very handwriting.
People who write with very narrow word spacing have this uncanny need to socialise and stay connected with others because of some inner feelings of insecurity.
An interesting thing about people with narrow word spacing in handwriting is that they do not stop to think whether it is necessary to keep some physical distance. In other words, they have very little understanding of personal boundaries.
Word spacing in handwriting shows many personality secrets about a writer. To know them all and many other things about handwriting, learn handwriting analysis.
If narrow word spacing exists along with a right slant in handwriting, you have a writer who is much more likely to forget social boundaries and put her hand your shoulder, hug you without warning or stand too close to you.
People with narrow word spacing in handwriting have a skewed sense of interpersonal familiarity.
Final words
Various research papers on personal space have established that people feel comfortable in the presence of others only if the rules of appropriate physical proximity are respected.
That is why when people other than your intimate partners, close friends, or family members come too close, you feel the need to step back. It feels annoying to have them right in your face, and it feels creepy when they make physical contact.
If you’re someone who is guilty of violating other people’s personal space or touching them when you don’t need to, you literally need to take a step back and think about their comfort level with your idea of interpersonal familiarity.
On the other hand, if you know someone who is a touchy-feely person, check out his or her handwriting. You’re sure to find some clue.
Disclaimer: One element of handwriting may be analysed at a time, but always look at the entire handwriting sample before arriving at any conclusion.
